Merry Christmas!

I'll be offline for the next couple of weeks, but I wanted to wish everyone a merry Christmas and a joyous New Year.

I think this e-card (based on an illustration from Help! Mom! The 9th Circuit Nabbed the Nativity) conveys the proper holiday wishes:

So much for Fidel's Today Show appearance

Someone better tell Penguin to cancel Fidel Castro's author tour.

The memoirs of the brutal communist dictator, based on interviews with "journalist" Ignacio Ramonet, were set to be published next March. But the Washington Post reports that U.S. intelligence believes the tyrant is close to death:

"Everything we see indicates it will not be much longer . . . months, not years," [Director of National Intelligence John ] Negroponte told a meeting of Washington Post editors and reporters.

Personally, I hope Fidel lingers for a while. Not only does he deserve a slow, painful death, but why give Penguin the publicity by having him kick the bucket just as this screed hits bookstores?

Regan publishing a new novel...by Mickey Mantle?!

If you thought that the OJ Simpson and Fidel Castro memoirs were signs of publishing's apocalypse, here comes another gem. Next March, Judith Regan will publish 7: The Mickey Mantle Novel, a fictional account narrated by a fictional Mantle.

According to the BS, the novel includes "claims that Mantle had an affair with Marilyn Monroe while she was married to Joe DiMaggio and that the late [Bill] Martin was a rapist." The author ironically cites journalistic integrity as his reason for putting words into Mantle's mouth:

“Every time I sat down to outline it, I knew that all of the stories that were told to me over the years were not documentable, and it concerned me, especially after what happened with Jim Frey,” said [author Peter] Golenbock, according to PW. “My choice them became to write a biography and leave these stories out—but that wouldn’t be Mickey Mantle. It really didn’t leave me any other choice.”

Regan had a choice -- it was whether or not to publish this book. And without evidence to back up those claims, she chose poorly.

Liberal Christmas Video: "The First Toenail"

Hillary Clunkton, Al Snore, Mayor Leach, and the other left-wing villains from the new Help Mom book seem to have caught the non-denominational holiday spirit. This video rendition of "The First Toenail" (think "The First Noel" without a tune) is hilariously awful, but very true to life. No doubt it will be playing at Speaker Pelosi's house this Festivus.

Ahmadinejad, defender of free speech

Talk about irony. Iran's Islamofascist president had to cancel a speech after pro-freedom student protestors started chanting and burned his picture. Here's his response:

Ahmadinejad responded by describing those students chanting the slogans as an "oppressive" minority.

"A small number of people who claim there is oppression are creating oppression and do not let the majority hear (my) words," he said.

Oddly this article from AFP fails to mention how Ahmadinejad is censoring information and creating oppression of his own.

Left-Wing Christmas Carol

Help! Mom! The 9th Circuit Nabbed the Nativity author Katharine DeBrecht has an editorial on Human Events today entitled "A Left-Wing Christmas Carol." It's an amusing and chilling read, folks -- a Christmastime tale of the far left's vision for the world.

Be sure to give it a read, and don't forget to set your Tivo for "It's a Secular Life."

Hillary plays Grinch in new Christmas story

The latest "Help Mom" book is here, and just in time for Christmas! Help! Mom! The 9th Circuit Nabbed the Nativity hits stores this week, and fans of the franchise are going to love this hilarious illustrated story of liberals trying to shut down the 3rd grade's Christmas pageant. (This is probably not a good stocking stuffer for your left-wing friends, though -- stick with a biodegradable lump of coal.)

Here's our official announcement of the book for anyone who's interested. Also, I should point out that Amazon is currently listing it as unavailable, but they're going to receive a new shipment this week, so if you order it now you should receive it well before the 25th.

Iran cracks down on Web usage

The WSJ reports that the Islamofascist president of Iran, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, has initiated a sweeping crackdown on Internet usage that includes bans on YouTube, Amazon, and Wikipedia. They're also requiring all bloggers to register with the government, and some critical minded bloggers have already been tossed into jail on charges of "insulting the prophets." High speed connections have also been outlawed.

Meanwhile, reports suggest that Ahmadinejad evidently enjoyed watching unveiled female dancers (gasp) during a recent visit to Qatar.