You're so vain, you probably think "Da Vinci Code" is about you

Simon & Schuster is publishing a novel by a woman named Kathleen McGowan who claims to be a descendant of the "sacred bloodline" of Jesus and Mary Magdalene. (It goes to figure that she's from L.A.)

USA Today points out with a straight face that this nutty Dan Brown-esque hypothesis is "a concept many Christians reject." Thanks for clarifying that, guys. No word as to whether or not McGowan has been asked to blurb the Pope's new book.